“Mum, I don’t want to be here anymore.”

The words sliced through me. I swallowed hard, terror rising in me. I was sat on the floor of my child's bedroom - she’d been crying for hours. Pillows were strewn across the room, all punched out, she was hanging by a thread and I had no idea what to do. She was now 11 years old. The first time she was only 7. Just weeks earlier than this she would want me to cuddle her and sing her to sleep every night. There was no warning.

No therapists would take our case... "too much risk". The local 'authorities' were under-resourced, oversubscribed and honestly - lacking in information and understanding. No one had answers... I was losing her. What had even happened? What had we missed? How did we get here?

"I don't feel safe at home."

I tried to ground myself, barely breathing at times. How could she possibly feel that way? She is so loved. How could we have failed her so terribly to have arrived here? I felt beaten down and lost... I was relentless, searching online for something... anything, that might help.

That’s when I stumbled across Conscious Parenting. Something about it felt different. It felt like the first real lifeline. I watched videos and found online community in those early (lockdown) days. I learned ways to meet her pain without trying to fix it. Ways to come back to myself so I could truly be there for her. It wasn’t the whole magic but it was quite the beginning.

I committed... I un-learned... I practiced being 'present', breath by breath and slowly things began to shift. Whatever happened within me was gradually leading my child to soften. I could barely believe it. So, I stayed. I met her where she was, without trying to change anything. Our connection had started to rebuild.

The tools that helped us survive became the foundation of my life’s work.

That’s where SAFE™ Practice was born... From that very floor... From those days and nights... From the quiet promise I made that - 'If we make it through this, I’ll find a way to pay it forward and help others do the same'. I was already witnessing an epidemic of children and parents just like us and sadly that's even more true today. I'd very much like to change that.

I'm Teri, and today I'm Mum to an awesome 18 year old who is keen to help as many others as possible by having me share these important parts of her story, along-side my own. We're blessed to live by the sea in Dorset, in the UK.

S.A.F.E.™ became ours, throughout my daughter's mental health crisis - when I didn't know where to turn or what to do. These four touchstones became my lifeline and now I offer them to you... Not as a fix-all (we don't do fixing!), but as a way to come back to yourself, so you can better be with your child.